Tuesday, February 14, 2017

Valentine's Day Unnoticed

It's the day of la-la-looooooove!!! What special traditions do you?

Would you like to know a secret? Our family doesn't really celebrate Valentine's Day. Wait, wait. Before you gasp and choke on your coffee, allow me to explain!

It has nothing to do with religious reasons, or any type of statement. In fact, my very first Valentine's Day as a married woman just about crushed me.

You see, I grew up in a home where Valentine's Day was just about as large as Christmas! I awoke to red and pink streamers, pancakes in the shape of hearts, construction paper or poster board cards made by my dad, lacy notes made by my mom, and even my brother would pen a note that said "Happy Valentine's Day".

But my first married Valentine's Day? I awoke with a flourish. To a quiet house. No streamers. No cards. My new husband was making lunch for work and with a "see ya later", he left the house. I knew he was planning something for later, so off to work I took myself, a tiny twinge starting in the pit of my stomach. When I returned home . . . still nothing. Supper was frozen pizza. We watched some TV. I kept casting glances at a very oblivious new husband. Then, came the tears. I cried in the darkness while we watched the flickering crime show on the television screen.

"What's wrong?"

Darn it. Cap'n Hook had spotted the tears.

"Umm, today?"

"What about it?"

"It's VALENTINE'S DAY!" My wail floated across the county, bounced off the State Capital, flew to NASA and hit the moon after reflecting off of a satellite.

After collecting myself, my blindsided husband explained himself. I think many women wouldn't understand, and some might consider it ogre-ish, but to me, it was what I needed to hear. Because it was the essence of who he is, the man I love.

"Honey, I can get you a card and roses. But I'd rather do something to show you I love you on my own terms, in my own way, when you're not expecting it. Valentine's Day coerces men to show their love and then accuses them if they fall short. I want to love you the way I love you, not the way Hallmark tells me I should."

So Valentine's Day? I still love it. My parents still give me Valentine's Day cards, and candy kisses, and sometimes I get streamers and roses in my office when my Mom sneaks in. But see, that's OUR day.

But LOVE Day? That's the day Cap'n Hook leaves a rose in the fridge when I get home after work, in the middle of winter blahs, on a day when it's unexpected. That's the day he does the dishes, puts the laundry away, and makes sure I have time to write on my book after the kids go to bed. That's the day he sends a text uncoerced that says "love ya". That's the day, that he chooses, to show me his love.

And I love being loved . . .

Is Valentine's Day a super special day for you, or does it slip by unnoticed?

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Jaime Jo Wright
Professional coffee drinker & ECPA/Publisher's Weekly best-selling author, Jaime Jo Wright resides in the hills of Wisconsin writing spirited turn-of-the-century romance stained with suspense. Coffee fuels her snarky personality. She lives in Neverland with her Cap’n Hook who stole her heart and will not give it back, their little fairy TinkerBell, and a very mischievous Peter Pan. The foursome embark on scores of adventure that only make her fall more wildly in love with romance and intrigue.
Jaime lives in dreamland, exists in reality, and invites you to join her adventures atjaimejowright.com.

2 comments:

  1. That's so sweet Jaime! I used to do Valentines up big like your parents when my kids were growing up. Heart shaped cake, wrapped gifts, candy, balloons, the whole nine yards. Now that I'm older and the kids are grown, I get something for my two grandkids and my husband and that's about all.

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  2. I just love this! :)
    Your husband expressed exactly what I've told people of my own opinion of Valentine's Day. It's not a big deal to me at all. A Valentine's Day gift is nice, but I would rather my guy do/get something for me just because he wanted to, not because the holiday says he should. I'm totally in favor of spontaneous expressions of love. :)

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